Battle For The Guy In Flannel
by MissAngel
Summary: What's Luke doing dating Lorelai's erm, cousin?
1. Marshmallows Roasting On A Open Fire

A/N: Don't own Gilmore Girls. My first Gilmore Girls fic *clap, clap*. Although you probably won't think so by this first chapter, Rory and Jess are together because number one: it already happened on the show and number two: Jess is a hottie!  
  
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Chapter One: Marshmallows Roasting On An Open Fire  
  
"I want to cook."  
  
"No, you'll burn down the house."  
  
"But I was watching the food channel yesterday and they were chopping stuff. That looks like fun, I wanna chop stuff."  
  
"I am now banning you from the television."  
  
"Good luck", Lorelai Gilmore said to her daughter, Rory Gilmore.  
  
"Do you really think that you could actually cook? I mean come on you still have an unopened grill during your last short-lived 'I wanna cook' phase", Rory scoffed.  
  
"Yeah because I realized that I don't have to grill. I just go to Luke's for hamburgers. Besides, what else do we need to grill?" said Lorelai scanning the fridge for possible easy to make dishes.  
  
"Well, there's hotdogs, marshmallows.." Rory began.  
  
"Marshmallows?" Lorelai cut her off.  
  
"You know when you put them on a stick and set them on fire.." Rory explained to her mother.  
  
"We could do that in a fireplace.. Can't you hear it now?" Lorelai said. She started to sing, "Marshmallows roasting on an open fire.."  
  
"Actually that's chestnuts and it still doesn't really mean that they're in a fireplace. Besides, then you don't get the nice campy feeling." Rory said glancing into the living room.  
  
"Rory, the last time I tried to go camping I was nine and I got tangled up in the tent. I nearly suffocated and the whole campsite was trying to cut the thing open. So the last thing I want my living room to feel is 'campy'", Lorelai said.  
  
"Oh come on you can't hate camping that much, you love it when a guy knows his way in the outdoors", Rory said to her mother.  
  
"Yeah, because if we were in a similar situation, he would be able to cut me free of the deadly tent", Lorelai said annoyed.  
  
Rory laughed. She tried not to she covered her mouth but the giggles just kept pouring out.  
  
"What's so funny?" asked Lorelai. She hated it when her daughter found her old childhood memories amusing.  
  
"The fact that you could classify a tent as deadly", replied Rory still giggling slightly.  
  
"You know I love it when you are just so darn understanding, Rory", Lorelai said sarcastically.  
  
"How'd we even get into this conversation again?" asked Lorelai trying to change the subject.  
  
"You wanted to cook and I, seeing that I really like this house and do not want it to turn into a pile of back dust, stopped you", replied Rory.  
  
"Oh yeah", replied Lorelai, she paused. "I decided, cooking's dangerous, real dangerous", she said as she closed the refrigerator door.  
  
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Lorelai was bored. She glanced around the diner. Boring. She looked at what was happening outside. Boring.  
  
"Luke?" said Lorelai staring into her cup of coffee.  
  
"Yeah", he replied wiping a dish.  
  
"I think I'm getting old", replied Lorelai.  
  
"Too much caffeine does that to you. You know makes you crazy."  
  
Lorelai raised her eyebrows, "crazy?"  
  
"Of course you are", he replied, "Lorelai, you're thirty three. That's not old. You're not even up to forty. Then yeah, you're old."  
  
"True, but nothing's fun anymore", she whined.  
  
"Well whining is not going to help", said Luke as he filed her coffee cup.  
  
"You sound like my mother. Minus the hairdo, clothes, and the fact that she has something rude to say about everything in my existence minus Rory."  
  
Lorelai continued to whine, "I'm bored."  
  
"What do you want me to do about it?" asked Luke as he leaned on the counter.  
  
"Let's do something fun", said Lorelai staring at the ceiling, "Like standing on the top of the roof and jumping off it and trying to fly."  
  
Luke rolled his eyes, "how adventurous and a trip to the hospital waiting to happen. Why flying?"  
  
"Because I was watching Superman last night", replied Lorelai.  
  
Luke looked at her strangely, "why the hell would you do that?"  
  
"I was flipping through channels and there it was, not a bird or a plane but Superman. I continued to watch it and t seems like all he did was get to change in telephone booths, save some Lois girl, and then fly. But the flying in a red cape looked like fun. That's when I decided that I wanted to fly."  
  
"So you want a cape now too?" replied Luke.  
  
"Yup, and one of those things with a letter on my shirt only instead of an 'S' for Superman, it's be 'L' for Lorelai."  
  
"So basically you want to fly around in a red sheet with some letter on you shirt, am I right?" replied Luke.  
  
"Well first of all it's cape, and secondly yeah basically. in Lorelai World", she replied.  
  
"Something tells me I do not wanna go there", said Luke.  
  
"Why not?" asked Lorelai smiling, "it's a fun place."  
  
"Yeah because you're all high on coffee and sugar", replied Luke.  
  
Lorelai smirked, "well at least my world is more happy and exciting then yours. In your world all you do is complain and scare away little children."  
  
Luke glared at Lorelai, "yea that's all I do, complain", he said sarcastically. Then he paused, "wait I don't scare little children?"  
  
"That's not what I heard from the kids across the streets," replied Lorelai.  
  
Luke was about to reply but someone called him over because they wanted a drink refill.  
  
Lorelai turned away from Luke started to drink her coffee but became startled when the diner door flew open and smashed against the wall as a muddy Rory Gilmore walked into the room.  
  
Good thing Luke was too busy giving Caesar some food orders or he would've been angry.  
  
Lorelai *almost* spat out her coffee, "Rory! What. what happened? Did some big bus pass by and splashed a bunch of mud on you. Oh! Or, was it those kids who have mud fights? They just hit Kirk."  
  
"No", she said as she sat down, "I saw Dean."  
  
"And he threw mud at you?" Lorelai guessed.  
  
Rory glared.  
  
"Fine", said Lorelai, "tell."  
  
"Okay, I saw Dean. He was making out with some girl."  
  
"And she, knowing that you were his ex threw mud at you."  
  
Rory glared at her mother again, "Do you want to know?"  
  
"Sorry, continue."  
  
"Anyway I was saying until I was so rudely interrupted", she looked at Lorelai and cleared her throat, "I saw Dean and the girl and my curiosity took over and I wanted to see who he was with. So, I was trying to get a better look and then you know that sprinkler Taylor put on the front law of the town hall because no one wanted to contribute to the 'Grass is Supposed To Be Green' fund?"  
  
"Yeah, the poor guy. He thinks one sad sprinkler head's gonna save the town from dead grass", said Lorelai  
  
"Well, you see I tripped over it, slipped and then landed in a big thing of mud. And then Dean and whoever that girl is and everyone looked and saw me and I swear I heard people laughing."  
  
"Oh, that's not a happy story, sorry", said Lorelai. She paused. ".Was it like riding on a Slip N' Slide?"  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "not helping. And yes, it was somewhat like a Slip N' Slide."  
  
Lorelai let out a small laugh. Rory drummed her fingers on the counter. "What? I was picturing it", Lorelai said in her defense.  
  
"Here, pie for you, Lorelai", said Luke, "Hi Rory."  
  
"Hi Luke."  
  
"Why are you covered in mud?"  
  
"Long story."  
  
"What happened? Mud kids?" he asked.  
  
"No, sprinkler head."  
  
"Enough said. You want anything to drink or eat?"  
  
"No I'm not planning to stay long the mud is staring to dry and become clay. So unless I don't want to be a living statue I probably should leave", replied Rory  
  
"I actually was just looking for a yes or no answer but alright", said Luke as he headed toward the kitchen.  
  
"Okay now how do you trip over a sprinkler head?" asked Lorelai as Luke left.  
  
"Easy I walk over, my foot bangs against it and forces my whole body to fall to the ground against my will", replied Rory.  
  
"Uh hunh you'd think that you'd look where you're going", replied Lorelai as she sipped her coffee, "just wished that I could've seen it."  
  
"Mom!"  
  
With that she grabbed her backpack and opened the door, "bye", she glumly said to her mother before she made her way back to the muddy heck.  
  
"Where's she going?" asked Luke as he returned.  
  
"I think she'll begin to sulk because of embarrassment. By the time I get home she'll be on the phase two, where you're in sweats and stuffing your face with all the crap you can eat", replied Lorelai watching her daughter leave through the window.  
  
Just then some woman walked through the door. She was wearing an extremely tight top and a skirt that rose to above her knees. She had shoulder-length chestnut hair that curled at the bottom.  
  
"Kinda cold for a skirt, eh", Lorelai whispered to Luke.  
  
She shifted on her seat trying to get a better look at her. Then she gasped, "oh god, save us all", she muttered.  
  
Luke looked at Lorelai. She wasn't exactly thrilled with the costumer, meaning she knew her in some way. Or maybe she just thought her by just looking at her. She could be quick to judge sometimes.  
  
The woman waved to Luke. "Hey Lukie!" she exclaimed.  
  
"Lukie?" Lorelai said looking up at Luke, "who's Lukie?" She paused and then got it, "oh god.."  
  
"Lorelai.." began Luke.  
  
"No, no, no, no", Lorelai mumbled anger sounding through her mumbles as she began banging her head on the table, "no, no! Ow!"  
  
"Lorelai, there's someone that I'd like you to meet", said Luke as she slowly put his arm around the woman.  
  
"Lorelai." Luke began to say.  
  
Lorelai bit her lip.  
  
"This is Marie", he said, "my um."  
  
"Girlfriend", Marie continued for him.  
  
"Yeah", Luke said.  
  
Lorelai faked a smile. "Well, well, well", she began to grab her coat, "that's um, horrib-I mean great!"  
  
"All right Luke, see yah tomorrow", she walked out the door.  
  
Luke stared astonished.  
  
The two watched as Lorelai fled out of the diner and practically ran down the streets to her house.  
  
"Lukie?" asked Maire, "what's wrong?"  
  
Luke stared down at the tabled that Lorelai was sitting at, focusing his glance at the coffee cup. "Lorelai only finished half of her coffee."  
  
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A/N: Did that suck? Did it rock? Well unfortunately I can't read minds so I really have no clue. That's where you come in. See the button next to the thing that says, "Submit review". Click it. Come on, it won't bite. 


	2. Lorelai and the Wolves

A/N: Don't own Gilmore Girls. Thanks to reviews! They help a heck of a lot! And now I will answer some questions:  
  
Why is Marie calling Luke Lukie? He wouldn't allow that.  
  
Luke really likes Marie. So much that he doesn't really care if she calls him Lukie. Maybe it's just not worth losing a relationship over. I know big step for Luke but as I said, he really likes her.  
  
Wouldn't Lorelai recognize her cousin?  
  
Correction. She DID recognize her cousin. She did get the best glance at her when she first walked but when she got a better look; she realized that it was indeed her cousin.  
  
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Chapter Two: Lorelai and the Wolves  
  
"Do we have to?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because we have to."  
  
"But I don't wanna", complained Lorelai.  
  
"Do you know how much crap you'll get from Grandma if you don't come?" Rory asked her mother.  
  
"Rory, I do not do well at these things", replied Lorelai, "that's you."  
  
"Well, there's always time to change", replied Rory.  
  
"Into what? A snobby sixty-year-old woman who fires maid every time they walk to fast or she doesn't like the way they made the flowers on the bed sheets face."  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "they're your family, you have to go."  
  
"I'd rather be raised by wolves", replied Lorelai.  
  
"That'd make a great book, Lorelai and the Wolves", exclaimed Rory.  
  
"That's not a book", Lorelai said as she sat down on her couch, "it's almost a reality."  
  
"I can't believe how long you can hold these grudges against your family", said Rory, "they raised you!"  
  
"So", replied Lorelai.  
  
"So, we are going to go to this family reunion, make nice, and go home", Rory stated.  
  
"Make nice?" Lorelai repeated, "What am I two?"  
  
"There's not too much of a difference between you and a two-year-old except the fact that you're potty trained."  
  
"Mean", Lorelai muttered as she walked into the kitchen.  
  
She held up the invitation and read it out loud, "Richard Emily Gilmore formally invite you to attend a reunion of the Gilmore family. Yada, yada, yada. Who cares, blah, blah, blah."  
  
Rory leaned against the wall, "It doesn't say 'yada, yada, yada. Who cares, blah, blah, blah."  
  
"That's what I think it says."  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "whatever, we're going."  
  
"Oh come on", Lorelai complained, "we go there every Friday, they've seen way too much of us. It might get to the point where they're tired and sick of us."  
  
"You're still going", replied Rory as she snatched the invitation out of Lorelai's hand.  
  
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Lorelai was not happy. She pouted the whole way over to her parent's house. She hated the fact that her daughter was so damn nice to her parents. She always thought that when Rory grew up, she would. They'd share it as some sort of mother-daughter thing. But no, Rory was just too damn nice.  
  
Lorelai complained that she didn't have enough coffee. Rory retorted that she drank three cups of coffee when they got ready in the morning to keep her awake because most likely she would be engaging in many beyond boring conversations with elder relatives that tended to repeat themselves a lot.  
  
Lorelai said that that wasn't enough coffee to fill her. Who knows how many boring Gilmore relatives out there? Maybe she'd only met like an eighth of them and they were all coming to the reunion then.  
  
Rory gave and let her mother stop for coffee at Luke's. Lorelai walked like she was a baby just learning take its first steps. Cautiously putting one foot in front of the other. The way she figured it, the longer it took to get coffee the longer it took to get to the reunion.  
  
"Mom!" Rory yelled, "Hurry!"  
  
"But", Lorelai tried to think of an excuse, "my feet hurt."  
  
"Oh please", Rory yelled back, "just this morning you were dancing to 'The Ketchup Song' when it came on the radio."  
  
"Yeah", Lorelai yelled, "that's why my feet hurt."  
  
"Go!" Rory scolded.  
  
It was sad that a mere seventeen year old could be so much mature then a thirty-three-year-old. It scared them often but in a way it was kind of interesting.  
  
"How long does it take to make coffee?" asked Lorelai as she rushed to the counter where Luke was in the diner.  
  
"Why would you want to know", replied Luke who was wiping down the countertop.  
  
"Because I'm trying to avoid this family thing and the longer it takes for me to get there the less time I have to spend listening to the Gilmores gloat about their wealth and how successful their life is so far."  
  
"Do you really think I would time how long it takes to make coffee?" said Luke.  
  
"How long?" Lorelai asked again.  
  
Luke gave her a cold stare, "fifteen minuets."  
  
Lorelai thought out loud for a minute, "Okay, great. Now if you could lose the coffee cups then that could stall me for a good ten to another fifteen minutes. That gives me half an hour then I'll get 'lost'", Lorelai made quotation marks with her fingers when she said 'lost', "that could last for a good hour or two until Rory demands that she drive and tries to take my driving privileges away from me. Then hopefully be the time we are finished will have hit rush hour again delaying us a good forty five minutes, plus the time we have to drive up there would be about fifty minutes so that'll stall us for.." She began counting with her fingers.  
  
Luke rolled his eyes, "about two hours", added for her.  
  
She looked at him and pointed her finger, "right. That was just what I was about to say."  
  
Luke adjusted his baseball cap, "well sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I usually have the coffee already made. But the good news is that the rambling you did definitely earned you seven minutes."  
  
Lorelai crossed her arms, "I want fresh coffee", she stated.  
  
"Can't get everything", said Luke as he poured the coffee into two coffee cups to go.  
  
"But I'm the costumer", said Lorelai, "and the costumer is always right."  
  
"You're not a costumer, you're a pest who keeps hanging around here and begs for food like a hobo", replied Luke.  
  
"Oh you know you enjoy it," she teased.  
  
"Actually", he said looking her in the eye. He stopped and paused, "these are for you", he said putting two coffees to go on the counter.  
  
Lorelai grunted, "you're supposed to lose the cups and we spend fifteen minutes looking for them."  
  
Luke replied, "Lorelai, Rory's getting out of the car to go yell at you."  
  
Lorelai gazed down at the floor, "guess I gotta go."  
  
"Bye", said Luke.  
  
"Bye", Lorelai replied and walked out the door.  
  
Luke walked up to the window. He watched Lorelai meet Rory. There was a short quarrel but then eventually the two climbed into the Jeep. Luke looked on as he watched the Jeep sharply turn a corner.  
  
Meanwhile Lorelai was trying to find the perfect spot to make a wrong turn. She finally found a good area. Just as she was about to turn the steering wheel she felt Rory's hand turn the car the other way.  
  
"Don't think that I don't know what you're doing", said Rory slowly taking her hand away from the steering wheel.  
  
"Why what ever do you mean?" said Lorelai acting innocent.  
  
"Oh please, cut the good girl act, you're trying to get lost."  
  
"Am not!"  
  
"Are to!"  
  
"Am not!"  
  
"Are to!"  
  
"Am n-"  
  
"Alright", said Rory, "that's enough. This could go on for a while."  
  
"Guess you're right", replied Lorelai. She paused, "am not!"  
  
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None of Lorelai's oh-so-cleaver tricks to stall were working. It was like Rory could read her mind. She knew exactly what she was going to do and when she was going to do it. She was watching her like a vulture.  
  
She just guessed that's what you get when you're so close with your daughter- you know exactly everything about eachother.  
  
Lorelai finally stopped the car in the driveway of her parents, Richard and Emily Gilmore. She just sat there staring at the stick shift.  
  
"I never knew that a stick shift could be so entertaining", commented Rory.  
  
Lorelai didn't focus her gaze towards Rory, just stared. "Rory, I REALLY do not wanna go.."  
  
Rory put an arm around her mother, "mom, it'll be fine. Just relax."  
  
"No", Lorelai said, "I can't."  
  
"Why not?" Rory said, beginning to feel concerned.  
  
"Rory, I haven't seen or heard from any of these people since I was sixteen aside from my parents", she hit her head against the back of her car seat and closed her eyes. "The last thing that they remember me as is the girl who got pregnant at sixteen and shamed the family."  
  
Rory bit her lip, "I know it's gonna be uncomfortable but they're my relatives too and I wanna meet them.. We can go early if we want to.."  
  
Lorelai faced her daughter, "Thanks.. I guess, I mean you made me come here."  
  
"Who knows, maybe you'll impress them with how well you've done, they might like your life", said Rory as she unbuckled her seat belt.  
  
"Like I said, I'd rather be raised by wolves", replied Lorelai as she got out of the car.  
  
Just as they were about to approach the door, Lorelai stopped Rory.  
  
"Wait let me fix something", said Lorelai since she began adjusting Rory's shirt collar.  
  
"Since when do you care the position and straightness of my shirt collars?" asked Rory questioning at what her usually laid-back mother was doing.  
  
"Rory, you're about to walk into the Gilmore home, headquarters of the rich and picky", Lorelai adjusted the collar until it looked good, "there, now you may enter."  
  
Rory opened rung the doorbell. The loud sound could be heard throughout the inside and even outside the house faintly.  
  
A well-dressed Emily Gilmore came to the door promptly.  
  
"Hello Rory", she said with delight sounding through her voice. Her tone then lowered at the sight of her daughter, "Oh and Lorelai."  
  
"Aw shucks mom", said Lorelai as she let herself in, "you say that as if you're not happy to see me."  
  
Emily didn't think that there was a way for her to answer that without actually saying something close to the truth. "Oh Rory come here", she said motioning for her Rory to come by her.  
  
"Let me fix this", said Emily adjusting Rory's shirt collar.  
  
"Mom did it", she said.  
  
"I see", replied Emily, "well come on you two, I have some people that you'll want to meet."  
  
"See", whispered Rory to Lorelai, "my collar was fine before you 'fixed' it."  
  
Lorelai grunted. Around her mother, she could do no right. Everything she did needed improvement in her mother's eyes.  
  
They walked into the well-lit living room. There was a bunch of elders and middle-aged adults all talking into the sitting area.  
  
"Everyone", Emily announced, "this is my daughter, Lorelai Gilmore."  
  
"Oh boy", Lorelai muttered beneath her breath.  
  
"And my very intelligent granddaughter, Rory."  
  
And old lady with oversized green earrings came over to Rory, "Oh Rory, come and sit here with us, we would love to here about your wonderful college plans!"  
  
And take you away from your horrible mother", Lorelai mumbled.  
  
"Mom!" Rory whispered. Then she increased the volume of her voice, "sure, I'd love to!"  
  
"So", said the old lady sitting her down, "I here you plan on going to Harvard and maybe Yale."  
  
"Yes, that is true", Rory politely replied.  
  
"You know, Richard went to Yale", said an older man sitting on one of the sofas, "and look where he is now."  
  
Lorelai thought that she might burst with all this 'oh Richard's been to Yale' blah, blah, blah, 'Rory come and be sucked into our high-society-we- don't-give-a-damn-about-what-you-and-your-mother-think-world'.  
  
Lorelai quickly turned away and walked down the hallway. She peered into the various rooms, half-hoping to see Marie so she could talk about Luke.  
  
She got bored and not to mention tired quickly. She could get enough of a workout just by walking around in her parent's house.  
  
She found a nice place to spend the rest of the afternoon and evening, the library. Usually Lorelai wasn't much for books, she rather watch the movie. But she still enjoyed hanging out in her father's library. It was sort of out there compared to the rest of the house so it was even a better escape then her bedroom.  
  
She went out unto the balcony and gazed down at the courtyard. Then she felt someone's hand resting gently on her shoulder. It surprised. She abruptly turned around causing the person to quickly yank their head back to prevent from being hit by Lorelai's amounts of curly hair.  
  
Well they got out of the way but because of Lorelai turned so quickly, she tripped, dragging the person down with her.  
  
"Ow!" the yelled.  
  
She looked down at the face that was just below hers. "Luke?"  
  
Luke looked at her, "Lorelai!" he said angrily.  
  
"Okay", she said getting off of him, "definitely Luke.."  
  
She outreached her hand to help him up. "Sorry", she said, "I usually don't do that to people on terraces, you just surprised me."  
  
"I know", he replied.  
  
She turned he head slightly to the side and looked at him strangely.  
  
"What? Don't tell me that that fall deformed my face", he said returning the weird look.  
  
"Wait, why are you here?" asked Lorelai.  
  
Luke grasped the terrace railing with his hands. "Marie", he replied.  
  
"Again, why are you here?"  
  
"Marie said that I should come and meet some people", he said.  
  
"Wow", replied Lorelai, "meeting the 'rents and more relatives. A big step for Luke Danes."  
  
Luke adjusted his baseball cap, "yeah, but they don't seem to like me."  
  
"Well", said Lorelai, "if you wear a baseball cap and jeans to a formal reunion that tends to raise a few eyebrows."  
  
"I know, but she kinda dragged me here on a spur of the moment kind of thing", replied Luke.  
  
"I see", said Lorelai. She thought for a second, "hey, can I show you something?" she grabbed Luke by the hand and dragged him to where she wanted to take him. 


End file.
